Saturday, February 27, 2010


I am just in a mood over names. It seems like nothing is ever right, no one is happy, and everyone has an opinion. (Which really, I don't care about anyway!!)

I'll start with John-Douglas. I don't know what is so damn hard with his name. We have had nothing but trouble with his name since the day he was born!!! His whole first name is John-Douglas (or John Douglas for those that don't like the little -, but that's not the point). What is so hard. STOP calling him John, Johnnie, or any variation there of! Also...he is not John D or such. JOHN-DOUGLAS!!! Or I don't mind JD. That was a nickname my husband and I agreed on LONG before he was born. And he fits a JD. =) So not only do we have people that can't get that part straight...apparently medical records and everything else can't either. Now his birth certificate AND his social security card are correct. (Which if the government can get his SS card right...when they have my wrong birthday...I think anyone can get this..right!?!?) Well, before we had problems with things coming to John D. Fox... and that completely ignored that he DOES HAVE A MIDDLE NAME!! So I told these people that nothing was going to be answered or paid until it was correct. Then I go to the hospital for his heart tests at 6 months and they can't find him. They ask if he was ever there...I told them HE WAS BORN THERE!! So they go on a search..and they have him under Snell! Which is funny, b/c I wasn't even under Snell at the hospital but apparently my son is just another. So after lots of work we finally got all the old doctors and records to be correct. John-Douglas S. Fox. Phew!! THEN we move. Now it is starting all over!! I got his insurance card for NY State and .... you got it...WRONG... John D. Snellfox. Ummmmm...HELLO!?!?! Who the heck do they have working in these offices!!! I filled out the paperwork..I know that I put it in correct. Did some office worker think "This mother must not know how to write their child's name, I'll fix it!?" Ugh. So, trying to get that fixed has been a bitch. I get a new card in the mail...and guess what..wrong again. Oy! Now he's John-Dougla S. Fox. Ummm. we're missing a letter there..but we're closer! I'm just not getting what is so hard with his name! =/

Now before we had him..everyone had an opinion about his name...but was "ok" with everyone. Well I am sooo glad to have please people. *roll eyes* But now we're going through hell with baby boy #2. We have mentioned names we were considering only to hear: "That name is stupid." "I hate that!" "that is aweful." "He's only going to get picked on." And all those wonderful comments!! You know what..I don't give a crap if you don't like it.. I don't care if you think we're playing favortism to someone..I don't care if you think he is going to hate it... it is HIS name and he is SAM AND MY BABY!! You all had a chance to name your child/ren. (Or you will have a chance.) If you don't like it, or can't adjust..then I am sorry for your naive pettiness. The name will grow on you, I'm sure. So thus, we have come up with a we are not sharing and no we don't want opinions or what you think it should be or how we should change it. We're happy!! We have agreed that this is the name WE FEEL is right...and thus, we know it is the name for OUR son!!

And while I'm on opinions. I don't want anyone's opinion about how I should have my tubes tied or the likes. We may, or we may not, be done with children. But either way, this is a decision between my husband and myself. But thanks for your non-solicited advice!!

Also, I am homeschooling. We have ageed on this before JD...and no one has since changed our minds. If anything, you all have cemented it. So stop telling us about how a certain name will effect the boys in school. B/c I'm sure the names the other student(s) in THEIR class will be calling them..won't amount to picking..more like a bunch of brotherly play!

Ok...I think that was my rant for today. LOL. I'm a mom..I'm protective of both my sons, and my husband, and when I get some of these comments or mistakes..I can't help but get some fur raised. But I'm better now. =)

Thursday, February 25, 2010


Ok. So I said I would update, since the last was put up for Halloween!! Wow has a ton happened since then!!!

In November, Sam was let go from his job and we had to move from our apartment in MA. We currently are staying with family while he looks for another job, and we can find our own place again. We are sooo ready to be out of here and back into our own place. Not that it hasn't been nice of my brother to let us live here, we just would love to have more space, our own stuff and JD to have his own room back!

We also found out last October we were expecting!! At the time we were excited even though we felt it was a bit early with JD being young. Now we're excited still, but worried b/c of the job situation. But let's hope that's all taken care of before June. Our estimated due date is June 20th, but I am set for a scheduled repeat we're looking around June 14th. We just found out 2 weeks ago that we are having another baby boy. So JD and his baby brother will be about 15 months apart, and I'm sure they will be the best of buds. :-D

JD had his first Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years! All were a ton of fun, and we have loads of pictures to remember it all.

JD had his FIRST birthday on Feb. 11th!!! I'm still in utter shock that he is ONE!! Where has the time gone, and where is my baby boy!! He has grown up SOOOO much too!! He is starting to chatter, trying to walk, and def into everything! We had a small family birthday party for him at the church. I did a Nemo theme, and JD seemed to be totally in love with it! I'll have to post some of the pictures. I made his cake, and my mom helped with decorating and getting the food ready.

So I think that is everything right now. A lot of changes, but nothing with a lot of info behind it. LOL. I'll have to get back to posting more. B/c I know I've missed a lot of the key JD moments!

A long vent

I know I have A TON to update to make some of this make sense..but I just need to get this out now.

I am probably just in a mood. But who knows. I'm so upset, so agitated, anxious and FRUSTRATED!! gaah.gif I'll appologize now..b/c I know this is going to be long and maybe a bit bouncy...starting with baby stuff and who knows where it will end. :(

I had a check-up with my OB today, and I feel like he just seriously doesn't care. gaah.gif Now, I guess I should expect some flippansy since it is a clinc type setting b/c I have medicaid right now with Sam not having a job. (Another vent in itself!) But I seriously feel like nothing is being checked. I honestly feel like there is no difference then if I just sat home until the end regardless.

I went today, and was in the office for over an hour..but spent all of 2 minutes with the doctor. He didn't check the baby, didn't ask me anything. When I mentioned some of my concerns..he just kind of brushed them aside. Told me I was pretty much paranoid. :(

I've been having some very strong pain on my left side (and we're talking..intense and crying pain even when I'm sitting still) for the last couple of days, and yesterday/this morning had a lot of extra fluid leaking. Brought it up to him and without even letting me finish explaining, said I probably pulled the round ligament and I'm peeing myself!! I mentioned the contractions..and was told...IT'S TOO EARLY!!! gaah.gif Has he NOT looked at my chart!!! With JD they stopped my labor starting at 25 weeks!!

And then there is THAT!! We have a MAJOR disagreement about dates. To some 7 days is not much..but in terms of needing a c/s and a history of pre-term..I think that is A LOT. He is basing the dates off an early u/s that was done when I lost the twin...which of course was measuring a bit behind. I tell him that I don't agree with the dates..and he said HE IS THE DOCTOR and he believes the u/s. Well...that's fine.... know I didn't get a degree in OB...but I didn't KNOW YOU COULD GET A POSITIVE PG TEST THE DAY YOU CONCEIVE!!!! gaah.gif Add to it all my u/s now the baby is measuring a couple days ahead of MY stated due date. If the baby is supposedly a week behind that..then this baby is measuring almost 2 weeks early. Shouldn't that be a concern too!!

I'm just sooo upset over all of this. I want to enjoy the pregnancy..but how can I when I feel like it's not being monitored correctly. We know I have a history of cervical issues and JD started to come within the next couple weeks. So how can he just be so flippant about the contractions, pain and such. I know each pregnancy is different....but come on!!! It just makes me totally miss my old ob. He was soooo great!! He even called when I wasn't going into the office to see how things were going with THIS PG. I am just sooo glad I had him for JD's pregnancy..b/c I can only imagine what could have happened to him if I hadn't!!! :crying

Add to all of this. I'm just soooo frustrated with Sam not having a job and having a family of 3 living out of a room. He has put in a GRAND TOTAL of 2 applications since he got let go in November. TWO!?!?! He put in one, didn't get it. Then this new one appeared..and he put in for it. I can only PRAY he gets it. B/c I don't know what we will do. It really adds to the stress with not knowing. Unemployment runs out in June, when this baby is due! If he does get this job..then we need to find a place near it, move...etc. And it starts in May. Not the best of timing. And Sam just doesn't seem to get why I'm soooooo frustrated!!

Can I please cry and curl up in a ball somewhere and just get lost for a bit!! I'm in pain, I'm upset, frustrated, and I feel like I have no where/no one to turn to!! :crying